singleness

well, so i didn't get to post at all yesterday, sorry. but christian dumped me. i didn't care at all. and me and duckie started doing that whole making out bit. before christian dumped me that is. but that's not why he dumped me. he said it was because we never talked or anything. now we're 'buddies with benefits'. i'm trying to stay single. i don't want to date anyone but david.

nothing really happend today, i went to school, nothing really happend at school, except for i had my friend savannah all to myself because her boyfriend didn't go to school today. which was ok i guess. then i came home, nothing happend then, i've been sitting on my computer all day. tomorrow i have to talk to my counsler. which i guess will be ok. my moms at work so im listening to the dresden dolls on full blast. i love them. they understand me better than i understand myself which i think is funny.

i've been so bored recently it's stupid. like other than last night i haven't had a life for a week now. it's so pathetic how irrelavent my life can simply become. now me and christian are talking on myspace about how i'll still make out with him even though we broke up.

so like i don't know. i'm probably am gonna start typing in this once a week because a lot more happens in a week then in a day 'ya know? god i need a life. someone should get me one for my next birthday in november.

oh god i have somehting to type about now. so like in january i'm moving to seattle, which i'm so happy about. i need to get out of here. people are starting to know who i am it's scary. i wanna be a loner again. i'm gonna do that when i get to seattle. i'm gonna seclude myself from everyone who wants to be my friend because friends are annoying and are bothering me. not anyone in particular to me though. just the concept of having many people who say they're your friend when they'd ditch you if the rest of the people were doing it, it's annoying as hell. plus, most of my friends are my friends because they think i can give them a good 'rep'. i don't see where they get that when i have the worst 'rep' in the grade. im the stoner, the girl who doesn't give a shit about you, the one who secludes her self from talking to people in person as a hobbie, the slut who likes to make out with almost anyone she thinks is cute and/or hott. i think it's my hair and dark clothing that gives them the whole 'niki has a good 'rep' idea. because if i was a 'preppy' i would have no friends. im posistive about that. except for maybe dylan and a few other people. other than that no one would care for me.

well, im done typing for today.

love,


n